Monday, 02 July 2012
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Dear Sun, I'm Going To beat your fucking ass!

Dear Sun, FUCK YOU!! You think this shit's funny? "Ohhhhhh, look at me, I'm the big bad Sunnnnn! I'm making everyone miserable! Just look at those fuckers sweat!" Yeah, well you're a big flaming dick, and nobody likes you!. You know what scientist refer to you as? An "unremarkable" star!. Yep! Bet that stings a bit, you pretentious,unremarkable, dipshit! You're a fucking dwarf! Just let that soak in for a second. You're A little, piss ant, dwarf. However,your behavior as of late, has secured your position as "The Largest Fuck Face In the Universe" If I have not illustrated my hatred enough for you, please read this poem. Hopefully it will clarify things a little better.
fuck you, Sun.
Your heat is insane
You're burning my skin off
and melting my brainI know that you're fire
and "warming's" your thing
but making me suffer??
Please try to refrain!I'm tired of sweating
It's getting so old
And now I'm forgetting
Why I can't stand the coldYou dumb yellow dwarf
Keep being defiant
Ill call up my friend
he's a huge HypergiantThat's right! You're a star
but he is one too
and he is much larger
and brighter than youFight fire with fire?
Don't mind if I do
We're getting together
and coming for you!Take heed of my words!
stop burning so bright
or me and my friend
will be ready to fightJust tone it down sun!
and we'll be alright
If not you'll be getting
your ass beat tonight.
Get it? Got it? Good! Pull your shit together, you Sun of a bitch! My tolerance for your douchbaggery has reached it's limit. Dial it down or I'm going to dial you up an ass beating that burns with the fury of a THOUSAND fucking Suns. And REAL Suns at that. Not just some runt of the litter,bitch sun like yourself. Dick!
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Comments (69)
you, Sun of a .. umm.. sun of a what?
Oh great, now the sun is going to be depressed.
OH MY!
... However, I must agree on this one. It has been hot here in Cali, but not nearly as hot as other places. Find a place to stay cool, Dude...
bahahaha... Love this.
The sun thinks the entire world revolves around him!
What a beautiful poem for that damn bully, the sun.
LOL DUDE...chill...have some ice tea...
I've always thought the sun was a jerk.
I don't have to take this shit from a yellow dwarf douchebag.
I am reminded of the song Asshole Sun.
@hintofme - I know. What a he-diva, right?
What's your take on the moon?
Cloud come shove the sun aside...
Okay, way to go, bro. But, do me a favor, when it gets fuckin cold this winter, don't complain about it and how you wish it was warmer. Other than that, despite all your shit, you are a very talented guy.
Funny.
Well, I for one, LOVE the sun!
I hope the sun gets Aids
I haven't seen the sun in days, please don't piss it off. Or at least tell him to f*** off & come chill with the Seattleites. It may be summer, but we're cold :(
I love the sun, .How could you say that?? meanie ;( SUMMER + No SUN= Boring summer...
@MzSilver - Hey fellow Cali girl! Where in CA are you? I am in Norcal and it has been blessedly cool. Temps are in the low 80s. I was in Chicago and Cleveland last week and couldn't deal with the humidity or the wind. I hope all you guys have much cooler weather soon! Thinking of you. :)
May your sun hide behind clouds for a while.
My friend and I - not me and my friend.... A message from your friendly grammar policewoman. (That's what I tell the boys, anyhow.)
How ironic that you posted this as I am now Larry the Lobster! Yesterday, we played on the jet ski and I payed for it with my fair skin! Well done, pal Joey! Say, no tan-line pics for us pervs?
Kick its ass? Good luck with that.
haha
Agreed!! Damn sun is a monster. Way to freakin hot in Wisconsin!!! It's not supposed to be turning into a desert out there.